Saturday, June 03, 2006
11:57 PM

once upon a time, there was a confused girl who had no direction in life. on one fortunate yesterday, she decided that she had dawdled at the fork in the road for too long, it's time to move on. here is an analogy to the choices she faces: on our left, we have soft creamy cheesecake with disgusting almonds in it, on our right, we have apple chips hair-raisingly grannysmith flavoured: both come in packages of good and bad and she can't make a choice, not one month ago and what the hell definitely not now!!

so she picked one anyway, and followed through with her decision, and if you have no idea what i'm talking about you sad wols person i'm refering to universities.

and anyways she picked the one starting with N, continuing with U and ending with S just because she wants to continue being one closet elitist bastard reveling in her Scholarly status, and she decided she should start to look through the package sent to her eons ago that had since been an immense help in dust collection (collect the entire set!). it said that in order to matriculate in year 2006, our main character has to fill in this foolproof OAM form that deceptively does not require any filling in at all. this form has to reach the Registrar's office by 5 June 2006, and, after a few silent awkward beats, it dawned on her that she has exactly 2 days to get it sent. then it also dawned that it was saturday and sunday and not only was the post office retardly closed, the Registrar was too. and as it dawned it got brighter and brighter, and she realised she has a camp on monday and she was facing a potentially devastating future in which she'd miss her deadline for university acceptance and continue to work for another year in Inno!!!!

so she packed herself up and headed down to the uni itself, only to find that the Registrar was really closed. (what the hell would it do that for?!) she saw, through the glass door, a pretty white box on the table right in front of the door that said 'for OAM forms submission'. she thought, and thought, and thought, and decided that barging through would involve alarms ringing, security guards manhandling, and her screaming 'but i just wanted to hand in my form!!' and so she made a smart decision and kicked the form in under the door.

of course, to avoid it being mistaken for trash, she also wrote on the envelope these exact words 'would some kind soul help me stuff this into that pretty white box on the table please?'. mindful of illiteracy, she also adorned the envelope with an illustration of a trash can and an 'X' across it with the words 'NOT FOR BIN'.

there concludes our heroine's adventures for the day. the narrator predicts that she would successfully matriculate (the word brings to mind the images of umbilical cords. don't you think so?) this year and go on to have a bright future because the form successfully went into the little white box.

Fin.



This is a work of a real and fucked up person in a real and fucked up world. Any resemblance to fiction is purely coincidental or subconscious plagiarism.

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